Gods & Monsters
by Katniss139
Summary: Alec and Jane have to stay with the Cullens after the almost battle. Some secrets are revelled and new friendships start to form.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello,**

 **just a few things before you start reading.**

 **Jane and Alec are 16 years old in this story.**

 **They are probably both out of character but I will do my best.**

 **and last thing. English is not my first language so I'm sorry for any mistakes.**

 **I hope you like the story and it would be nice if you left me a review.**

* * *

Frustrated I let my gaze wander between the Cullens and their allies.

Master Aro may have ordered me to stop trying to hurt them but I just can't accept that this stupid girl resists my powers.

Much to my dismay she was keeping her shield up the whole time.

The Cullens little pet must have realised that no matter how hard I am trying, I just can't find a weak spot and smiles at me smugly.

How dare that unexperienced newborn to smile at my failure?!

I am just about to physical attack her as Alec wraps his arms around me from behind holding me back.

Sometimes I really hate my twin who just happens to know me better than I do myself. He knows every step I am going to take before I know. It's really fascinating.

Thankfully our masters ignore my little outburst instead of punishing me.

My brother leans closer to me, holding onto me tightly. "She's not worth it, Janey."  
I calm down slightly as Alec kisses my cheek gently, losening his grip but keeps his arm aound my shoulders though.

Alec is right, Bella is not worth the consequenzes at all.

Our masters or rather Caius and Aro found out that the best way to punish Alec and me was to seperate us.

If you believe it or not that is the only reason we follow their orders blindly.

I just can't bear the thought of being without Alec. He was always there for me, when our father left us and our mother, when we got bullied because we were different, after these boys attacked me in the woods and forced themselves on me, when we were burned at the stake in front of all these laughing people and ever since than when life finally turned out endurable.

It is Alec who makes my life livable.

If something happened to Alec, I swear I would throw myself in a fire. It wouldn't be the first time I am burning alive.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I only start to pay attention when the Cullens start to protest loudly.

"What did I miss?", I whisper to Alec quietly.

"Lady Athendora suggested to the Masters that the two of us should stay in Forks", he replies obvious desperatze. "They want us to stay with him! Just because they allied with these stupid overzised dogs!"

Before I can think of all the witnesses, I have already thrown myself on my knees in front of Marcus. I can't stay here and watch the Cullens play happy family. I can't watch that hypocrite being the loving father when he abandoned years ago.

Master Marcus may not have the most to say in this circle but he sure understands my situation the best.  
"Please Master", I beg him. "Don't do that to us. Can't you see it?"

"My sweet child", the master takes my hands in his and pulls me back on my feet. "I understand it but this is not a punishment as you might think now. You and Alec are our most precious and trusted guards. The both of you can adapt to their diet and every given situation. We confide in you to take care that none of our rules get broken."

I close my eyes for a second as Alec places his hand on my shoulder gently. "Please Masters forgive my sister, we feel honored that you give us this opportunity."

I brush his hand off my shoulder angry. "I don't feel honored at all! I want nothing to do with this traitor!"

"Enough!", Caius calls loudly. "It's either you two stay here or just you do, Jane!"

"It's not fair", I prostest angry. "Master Caius we can be much more useful in Volterra than here."

"Jane I said it's enough", the youngest of the three leaders stares down on me. "I don't appreciate you talking back to me like that."

I grit my teeth angry. "Forgive me, Master", I fake apologize mocking him as I curtsy to him. "It won't happen again."  
"Believe me, I'll make sure of it", he hisses at me, stepping closer to me threatening. Caius may not be the tallest but still he towers over me.  
Too bad that I am not scared of his temper. "How are you planning to do that? You can't even speak up to your wife!"  
I glare up into his cold red eyes. I probably went too far but it is simply the truth.

Caius is about to slap me but than drops his hand again. "Your not worth it."

I knew from the second he liftet his hand that he would never hurt me. Even if he wanted to, he couldn't and we both knew it.  
"No it's you who is not worth it", I reply smirking before curtsying to him again and stepping back to stand next to Alex again.

Aro looks pretty unhappy about the little discussion between Caius and me so he just turns to the Cullens.  
"We appreciate that Alec and Jane are welcome to stay with you", he tells the head of the family. "They will return as soon as possible. I am glad we are still friends, Carlisle."

Carlisle nods. "Could you give us a few days? So we can see our friends off and get their rooms ready."  
"My sister and I can share a room", Alec interrupts him immediately. "Please don't put yourself to any bother on our account, Carlisle."

I roll my eyes at my brother for always being so polite even to people who don't deserve it at all.

Some grumbling gets loud on the opposite side and I can filter words like incest and witch twins.

I glare at them all, trying to use my power again but it doesn't work.

How am I going to live with that stupid family when I can't even use my power. As much as I hate to admit it but without my powers I am totally vulnerable. I never learned how to protect myself not back than when I was a human and not now that I am a vampire. I always had Alec to protect me and my power but right now the thought of being defenseless and depending solely on Alec unsettles me.

"That's nice of you, sweetheart", Esme smiles at my brother, loving. "But Alice and I would love to fix each of you, your own room."

"It's unnecessary", I tell her firmly. "I'll be staying with Alec."

The mother figure of the Cullen family nods, still smiling. "I understand, my dear."

I glare at her, half-hearted. As much as I hate to admit it but I like her the most out of them all.  
She really is very nice and somehow even reminds me of my own mother with her loving nature. I feel quite sorry for her to be honest. She doesn't have any idea who she really is married too.

It will break her heart when she finds out the truth.


	2. Chapter 2

The moment I enter my room back home in Volterra, Caius has me pushed up against the wall.

"What the hell was that?", he hisses at me, angry. "How dare you talking to me like that?"

I roll my eyes up at him, wrapping my arms around his neck. "You know exactly how I feel about the Cullens. You should learn to talk back to your stupid wife instead of doing what she says."

He tries to keep up his glare but than his eyes soften. "You know it's not that easy. We can't have anyone know about this."

Caius runs his hands down my sides, lifting me up by my thighs.

"I know", I wrap my legs around his waist. "I am just the mistress and have been for 2000 years."

He starts placing light kisses down my neck and shoulders. "I know Jane but unfortunately Athendora is my mate. I owe her a lot, you know that. I can't leave her even if I wanted to."

"Don't talk about her in here", I hiss at him. "or you can go and see if she is willing to take care of your needs."  
"Calm down", he rolls his eyes annoyed as he starts to undress me slowly. "We just stop talking at all."

I simply nod and remove his clothes slowly.

With Master Caius or rather our rendezvous, eternity doesn't feel so long anymore at least for a whule.

He may be the most unlikely person to have an affair with but Caius is the only one around here apart from my twin who is at least near my physical age.

He is quite attractive too and I think it's pretty hot that he actually shows his temper sometimes. In my opinion it makes him authentic.

Aro is just one huge fake in that regard. He always pretends to be the nice guy, smiling in your face while he backstabs you. He is a good master, I can't complain as his favorite but I would never touch him.

The masters are all very different though since Marcus is very calm.

Although I am sleeping with Caius, Marcus is my favorite.

After a long day or a mission, there is nothing I enjoy more than his company.

We usually don't talk but his simple attendance relaxes me. I am not sure why that is but I think it has something to do with the way I feel about him.

I feel sorry for this man who lost the love of his life and even after mere thousand years still sufferes and griefs. Maybe Marcus reminds me of my mother when our father just abandoned us and than after Alec and my deaths. My mother died from a broken heart and I am sure that if Marcus weren't immortal he would too.

These feelings of empathy and understanding make me feel human. They make me feel alive and in some twisted way let me hope that I will find such pure love as well.

It is very uncommon that neither Alec nor I have found our mate yet. We are almost two thousand years old and the more time passes I start to lose hope.

Having to move in with the Cullens who are all in happy relationships makes me bitter especially with him being happy.

It makes me angry that, after everything he did to us, he found love and happiness.

He just lives with his family like nothing ever happened.

"I am going to miss this", Caius interrupts my thought by kissing my cheek before pulling away from me.

"Miss me or the sex?", I tease him as I pull the covers over me, sitting up in my bed to watch him as he gets dressed.

"Both", he replies much to my surprise. I didn't think he would actually miss me, let alone admit it. "We'll stay in touch when you're gone. I'll come and visit you every once in a while."  
"Won't Lady Athendora grow suspicious?", I raise an eyebrow at him.

"No I already talked with Aro and Marcus that I will supervise your mission", he shakes his head. "I trust you, Jane. Find something that gives us a reason to destroy them."

"I will, master", I promise him, smiling. "This is something personal to me and not just business."  
"I am glad I can confide in you", he sits on the edge of my bed, stroking my cheek. "Now get dressed and pack your belongings together."

I nod and within the blink of an eye, master Caius is gone.  
I slowly get up from my bed and start to get dressed in something more casual.

I pull on a very simple, dark red dress that reachs my knees and my almost black cloak.

Than I gather my personal things together. I don't have many clothes that are suitable for an almost human life so I will have to go shopping before we arrive. I am thinking about heading to Milan with Alec but my dear brother doesn't like shopping not even for my sake. So it seems like I'll have to go on my own.

When I am done with packing the very few things I'll be taking, I go to the throne room to inform my masters about my plans.

Like expected Alec is not very happy about it but than Gianna came in with her phone.

"Miss Cullen called masters", she informs the masters. "She left a message for Miss Jane."  
"Which one of them?", Aro asks her gently. "Tell us the message."

"Miss Alice Cullen", Gianna replies with her head bowed. "She wishs for Miss Jane to meet her in Milan tomorrow in the morning for an joint shopping trip."

"That are amazing news", master aro calls excited. "of course our beloved Jane will join her. This an great opportunity to get to know each other better, Jane."

"Of course, Master Aro", I agree to him, calmly.

Within I am fuming with anger and wish I could use my powers on him but that would just get me killed.

The masters dismiss Alec and me after informing us about the details of our mission.

I say my goodbye to the other members of the guard and than it is time for me to leave to Milan to meet up with the Cullens fortune teller.


	3. Chapter 3

When I arrive in Milan, Alice already expects me.

"I am so happy that you join me", she throws her arms around my neck, hugging me tightly. "We will be good friends."

"Sure not", I grumble as I push her away from me.

"Come on, Jane", she grabs my wrist, pulling me with her. "We need to get you some pretty clothes. And I see a new haircut in your future."

This is going to be a long day, I groan frustrated.  
"Forget it", I hiss at her, sharply. "New clothes are fine but I won't let anyone near my hair. I don't trust these stupid humans. I am a vampire my hair won't grow back when they ruin it."

"It will look good", Alice tries to persuade me as she pulls me into the first shop. "Caius will like it."

I stop dead in my tracks and stare at the black haired woman. "What did you just say?"

"I said Caius will like it", she replies grinning.

"Why would I care if Master Caius likes it or not?", I raise an eyebrow at her.

"You are having an affair with him", she shrugs. "or at least slept with him once."

"How do you know?", I asks her angry. "And who else does?"

Alice explains me everything about her visions and that she saw how Caius made the decision to come to my room. Edward knows as well since he saw that in her mind.

Caius is going to be very mad about it when he finds out.

To my big surprise Alice and I have a very similiar taste in fashion. Shopping with her is not as bad as I thought it would be.

She even managed to persuade me to let my hair get cut. The hairdresser shortens my hair to my shoulders and than curls it, letting it appear just a bit longer than chin length.

Alice was right, it really looked a lot better than before.

We bought lots of shirts, dresses, skirts, tops and high heels. In Volterra I never get to wear nice clothes apart from the usual red or black dresses and my cloak. The only time I get to wear something different is when I am allowed to go hunting with Heidi.

"I thought we could go hunting in the woods tonight", Alice suggests later when we take our shopping bags to her car.

"No thanks", I shake my head. "I had dinner before I left. And I don't plan on following your diet."

"Jane eventually you will have to", she tells me. "Renesmee is half human after all. It would be much to dangerous for her to have you and Alec drinking human blood."

"We are 2000 years old", I narrow my eyes at her. "Our self-control is much better than all of yours together."

"We'll talk about it at home", Alice sighs exaggerated.

"There is nothing to talk", I say firmly as we go back to the mall.

The next few hours we buy even more clothes and accessoires but than Alice decides it is time to get us some lingerie.

"So how long has this between Caius and you been going on?", she asks curious. "I mean he is married."

"Why would you care?", I conter, not really wanting to answer her.  
"I just want to get to know you", she replies. "Don't worry, I won't tell Edward."  
"I don't care about Edward", I answer her. "I am not telling you because it's none of your business."

"I understand", Alice says shortly but I see she really wants to know it.

I get it that it is terrible for her to not know something but I like to see people suffer. That's how my affair with Caius even started. We both like to see other people in pain and causing it to them at least when they deserve it.

Sometimes I wonder if Caius and I could have had a chance, had things been different. I mean it's not like I love him but I can't help and wonder. Would he have chosen me if he had met me first? It really is ridiculous.

"Too long", I answer her before I can stop myself. "I know it is wrong but I just can't stop it. He intoxicates me and just makes me feel alive."

"I understand", Alice nods as she hands me lots of lingerie to try on. "It must be really hard for you. Maybe the distance will help you figure out what you really want."  
"I know what I want", I sigh. "I just had to learn that I don't always get it."

"So you want to be with him?", she asks curious.

"I don't know", I admit uncomfortable. "I like his attention and how he can't hurt me physical."

"Do you love him?", Alice wants to know.

"It's not about love", I shake my head, sighing. "It's just about sex. Caius loves Lady Athendora."

"In other words", she states. "You love him but he doesn't return your feelings."

"I do not love Caius", I reply firmly. I am not exactly sure who I am trying to persuade, me or her. "What about you? How comes that your mate didn't join you?"

"Jasper doesn't like shopping", she shrugs.

"I meant why is he not here to protect you?", I raise an eyebrow. "How comes that they let you go shopping with me?"

"I saw that you won't harm me", she explains. "They were not happy about it though."

"Well that can change", I tease her, growling. "You wouldn't even see it coming."

"I trust you", Alice replies confident.

"That's a big mistake", I say indifferent.

Unfortunately I can't deny that Alice isn't all that bad. I mean we sure won't get friends but I can see a good shopping companion in her. We've been here almost all day and shopping non stop. Alice didn't complaim once about it and she has an excellent taste.

We bought so many stuff it is unbelievable. She also helped me pick out a few clothes for Alec since he has the same problem as me.

I never knew shopping could be so much fun especially with a Cullen.

Our last stop before we get on the plane to Forks is a technic store. Alice insists that Alec and I will need mobile phones when we are in Forks.

In Volterra we don't have mobile phones apart from Gianna. The masters like their traditions and dismiss new intentions.

On our drive to the airport and than on the flight Alice explains me how to use it. I have to admit that I am quite impressed and immediately use it to call Gianna. She promises me to tell Alec that we are almost in Forks and I expect him to pick us up at the airport.

Since everyone on the plane is sleeping, I just play with my phone quietly while Alice pretends to be asleep as well.

The thing I like most is the photo app. I just have to hold it in front of me and push the button on the screen.

Alice later takes pictures with me together. It is so funny especially since we can pull weird faces and all.

During our flight I realise that doing girly stuff can really be fun. I mean I won't suddenly go all Cullen but I guess it will be fine to acutally act my physical age sometimes.  
What do the humans nickname it?

Sweet sixteen.


	4. Chapter 4

By the time we finally arrive, Alec is already waiting for me.

I quickly skip over to him and throw my arms around him, hugging him tightly. "I missed you. Look what I got."

I hand him my new mobile phone excited. "Isn't it beautiful? And look what I can do."

I take it from him again to show him the pictures Alice and I took.

"Can you show me how it works?", he aks me curious.

I nod and hand him the phone I got him. "I will later."

"Don't forget your bags", Alice reminds me, stepping out in the hall with all our shopping bags at all. It are so many that I almost can't see her behind them as she's just as tiny as myself.

I take the half from her and hand them to my twin who immediately carries them to me. Since Alice didn't have her car with her, we take a taxi to the Cullens house. Sure we could have run but with all the bags it would have been too complicated.

The closer we get to their home the more uncomfortable I get.

In Milan with Alice I could have defended myself if necessary but here I am defenseless.

As soon as we arrive Alice mate Jasper comes out to greet her. He gently wraps his arms around her and places a loving kiss on her lips.

I quickly turn away as jealousy wells up in me. I wish I had a mate too or just a man who loves me as much as the Cullen men love their wifes.

"Alec, Jane", Esme appears on the front porch, greeting us warmly. "Welcome to your new home."

Carlisle steps besides his wife. "Please come in and make yourself at home."

Alec pushs me forward lightly when he notices that I am about to growl at that hypocrite. As if we were welcome here, we never were anywhere specially not with him.

I ignore Carlisle as I follow his wife in the house, Alec and I'd have to call home for at least the following century.

Esme leads us upstairs and down the hall before stopping in front of a door.

"This is your room, Jane dear", she opens it to let me in.

I take a step inside and look around.

One wall consists solely of glass while the other three are painted in a dark red. The white funiture stands in a nice contrast to it. The best thing is the huge book shelf though. It is filled with hundreds of books in several languages.

"It's really nice", I turn to Esme, thanking her politly. "But where is the closet?"

"Alice meant you would need it", she smiles when she opens a door.

Behind it was a huge walk in closet. A huge grin spreads on my face. "I never had such a big closet. I'll never be able to fill it."

"Never say never when Alice is around", the older woman laughs. "She already claimed you as her new shopping victim."

"That's okay", I shrug. "Shopping with her was quite nice to be honest."

"You are the first one to say that", Esme chuckles. "Even Rose hates to go shopping with Alice."

"I am not like others", I just reply as I place my bags down.

"I can see", she nods, smiling again. "Would you like to see your room too, Alec?"

"It would be a pleasure", my brother answers politly.

She leads us out of my closet and into the room across from mine.

Alecs room is very similar to mine just that his walls are painted in a deep blue instead of red.

He thanks Esme who than leaves us alone to get settled in.

I take my time unpacking first the clothes I got for Alec and than mine.

My brother made himself comfortable on my bed, watching me as I unpacked.

I knew we would have to meet the rest of the family the second we go downstairs. I wasn't very happy about it.

"You know I'll do my best to protect you, right?", he asks me gently.

"I know Alec", I sigh, placing the last dress in my closet. "I just really don't want to be here."

"Maybe it won't be all that bad", Alec tries to comfort me. "I mean you enjoyed shopping with the fortune teller, you said so yourself."

"I never said that I had a problem with all of them", I shake my head. "I just dislike the shield, the mind reader and him."

"Come on", he gets up. "You can handle Edward, you know how to keep your thoughts hidden from a mind reader."

"Fine", I sigh as my twin leads me downstairs.

I can smell the werewolfs before I see them.

They really stink, it's so disgusting I immediately stop breathing.

The Cullens as well as their mutts are all waiting for us in the dining room.

"Thank you for joining us", Carlisle gets up as we enter the room. "We would like to introduce you to Jakob Black and his pack."  
I let my eyes wander over them, slowly stepping closer to Alec.

Sitting next to the half-vampire is Jacob who apparently is her mate and the leader or as they call it Alpha of the pack. Than there are Seth who seems not much older than Alec and me and his older sister Leah. While the girl seems even more angry about Alec and me being here than Jacob and Bella, her brother is smiling at us brightly.

"There are rules", the Alpha gets , glaring at us. "You are not allowed to enter the reservation in La Push. And you are not allowed to attack humans or shapeshifters. In case of questions or problems, you come and talk to me, Leah or Seth. There are other shapeshifters out there that won't keep from killing you on the spot."

"Our mission is to make sure that you are not dangerous for our kind", my twin nods politely, placing his hand in my shoulder. He must have sensed my anger at that dog for talking to us like that. "It is very helpful that you are willing to cooperate."

"We are not doing that for you", Leah spits at my twin angry.

I am just about to jump at her when Alec wraps his arms around me, holding me back. "Sister I warn you, control yourself."

"I won't let that stinking dog, talk to you like that", I hiss at him, trying to get out of his grip. Unfortunately it's useless. I am just not a fighter, I can't even break free from my brother and he is five minutes younger!

"Will you give up already?", Alec asks me annoyed. "You are behaving like a spoilt kid."

"You are a spoilt kid!", I snap at him. "I am older than you!"

"Really, Jane?", he lets go of me, rolling his eyes. "I am not having that discussion with you again."

"Just shut up", I push him away. "There is nothing to discuss anyway. I was the first born and the first to be changed too."

"You may be older but therefor I am more mature", Alec grins at me.

"That's so not true!", I scoff at him.

Somebody clears its throat to get our attention.

I turn towards the person and realise that it is Carlisle himself. "I am sorry to interupt you but I think there are more important things to talk about right now."  
"You have no right to tell us what is important and what not", Alec turns towards him as well.

Now it's my turn to hold my brother back. I am not worried he could attack Carlisle physical but that he could say something he regrets afterwards.

"I am sorry if I offended you", he apologizes. "My family and I would just like to tell you our rules now. I soon have to leave for work."

I roll my eyes at his words but nod. "Enlighten us than."

"We would love you to feed on animals as long as you stay with our family", Carlisle explains us. "You are not allowed to use your gifts unless someone attacks you. Nobody here will attack you and we expect you to keep from it too. In this house we are treating each other with respect that counts for you too. I hope you will accept our rules."

We both nod, accepting the rules at least for now.

With all that said, Alice gets up.

"Come on, Jane", she grabs my wrist. "I want to tell you all about our next shopping trip while going hunting."  
"I am not hungry", I protest loudly but let her pull me outside.

Being over two thousand years old, I have enough inside into human nature or rather vampire nature to know that I have no chance to change her mind about hunting anyway.


	5. Chapter 5

The next few weeks I spent a lot of time with Alice.

We go shopping or to the spa almost every day. She can be a bit hyper sometimes but I actually like that about her. Everyone I know is always so boring. It's never something new or interesting.

You could say that we are actually friends.

Since I am with Alice most of the tiem, Alec had to find a way to keep himself entertained too. He gets along well with the Cullens, being more adjustible than me. People always prefered my twin over me. He has a better selfcontrol and stays calm when I would have already freaked out. It makes him seem harmless but actually he is much more dangerous than me.

Alec trains his fighting skills with Jasper and Emmett, fixes cars with Rosalie and helps Esme with the chores. He is just like a perfect new addition to their family.

All I do compared to that is going shopping and running errands with Alice. We are actually looking for a new house in Canada at the moment since the Cullens have been here way too long lready. They are afraid that people will grow conspicious.

Thankfully Edward and his shield leave me alone most of the time.

I feel a lot more comfortable without Bella around to protect them. In case they would attack me, I could at least defend myself now.

While Edward and Bella like to be by themself in their own house, their daughter prefers to spent time with her Jake and grandma Esme as well as her aunts and uncles.

Although we've only been here for thirteen weeks now, she already grew a lot. She is almost as tall as Alice by noe. I am very proud that I am two inchs taller than Alice. It is nice to not the the tiny one for once.

Renesmee sometimes joins Alice and me when we go to the supermarket for Esme. She seems to be nothing like her parents and actually shows me her powers sometimes.

It's really fascinating to see the world through a kids eyes.

Thanks to Renesmee spending so much time at the main house, the shapeshifters are there all the time as well.

The only good thing about it is that Alec and I get lots of occassions to talk to them.

Jakob and Leah are not all that willing to cooperate but Seth makes up for it.

Apart from his disgusting smell he is quite nice.

He actually asked me to use my powers on him once. I demonstrated it on him for a few seconds and almost got myself killed by his sister in the progress. Thankfully Seth explained it to her that he wanted it. She was not happy about it but it was obvious that that my power fascinates her too.

The young shapeshifter went to run some errands with Alice and me once where he told me the legend of the Quileute and explained the whole imprinting thing to us.

So when Caius comes to visit us tomorrow, we actually have to tell him something.

I have to admit that I really miss my time with him. The Cullens were very nervous about his visit especially since he was coming alone. Master Caius was known for his bad temper after all.

Alec and I both put on our cloaks and Volturi crests, beneath it we were our new casual clothes or in my case a black mini dress that barely covers anything.

It was already pretty late when Caius arrived in Forks.

Official my master would only arrive tomorrow but he came earlier to see me.

He knocked politily, waiting for Carlisle to open him.  
They talked for a few minutes before he finally asked me to join him on a hunting trip.  
Edward scoffed loudly when Master Caius mentioned it, obvious the mind reader was not amused at what he read in his mind.

I quickly say goodbye to my brother and than leave with my master.

Of course hunting is the last thing on his mind as he takes me to his hotel room.  
Today Caius seemed to be in an unusally good mood.

He lightened a fire in the fireplace and fills two champagne flutes with blood.

He than sits down in an armchair and pulls me on his lap carefully.

"It's almost a shame that your eyes will turn red again", he whispers to me, his arm resting around me. "Gold suits you."

"Thank you", I peck his lips, wrapping my arms around his neck. "Feeding on animals is not all that bad."

"How are you adjusting to the Cullens lifestyle?", Caius strokes my thigh gently.

"I took quite a liking to Alice", take a sip from the blood. "We are going shopping a lot. The youngest of the shapeshifters is interested in our kind. He is very willing to cooperate with Alec and me."

"And the others?", he asks me.

"I try to stay out of their way", I shrug as I lean closer to him. "Esme is very caring though and the childs power is really fascinating."

"I'm glad you are adjusting to them", he presses a light kiss to my neck. "I was worried you would get yourself in trouble."

"That's very kind of you", I smile at him. "How are things back at home?"

"The same as always", he sighs annoyed. "Just even more boring now that you are gone."  
"I am sorry to hear that", I reply politely.

We keep talking for mere hours before he pulls out a small wrapped gift box.

I open it, curious. I never got a present from Caius before.

Inside the box is a silver necklace with a wing shaped charm that holds several tiny diamonds as well as the matching earrings.

"Wow thank you", I kiss him deeply. "It's beautiful."  
"I'm glad you like it", he smiles slightly and gets up with me.

Being with Caius after so ling is pure bliss.

He is so gentle tonight when he usually likes it more passionate or rough.

I will never understand why Lady Athendora refuses to sleep with him. If he was just half as gentle with her, she should be lucky.

I mean I am not complaining, sex with Caius is always fun but it is nice to be treated for a change.

My master takes me back to the Cullens around midday the next day.

"Jane I am so glad you are here", Alice greets me excited. "I picked out the perfect outfit that matches your new jewelry."

She grabs my hand and pulls me upstairs quickly. I let her hand me a dark red dress and than fix my hair, curling it into beach waves.

I tried to protest but to be honest I really like being her dress up doll.

When we come back downstairs, Alec is already telling Caius everything he found out.

All the Cullens as well as the three shapeshifters are sitting around the dining table, listening interested.

"Jane, you look stunning", the master gets up, interrupting my twin.

"Thank you", I curtsy before sitting down by his side.

Alec continues to inform Caius who places his hand on my thigh. I try to stay calm but I swear if I were human I would have blushed like crazy by now.

Edward glares at me, obvious uncomfortable. "Could you at least try to control your thoughts?"

I roll my eyes at him but try to think of something else but it is not easy to focus with Caius stroking my thigh.

After this little meeting master Caius has to leave again much to my dismay.

He promises to return in a few weeks though to keep up with Alecs and my progress.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello,**

 **so I am back again. Sorry it took me so long to update. I was quite busy and didn't really know in which direction the story should go. But thankfully I had a really nice dream a few nights earlier and now I can see the whole plot in front of me.**

 **I hope you like it and I hope you leave me a Review.**

 **Have fun.**

* * *

Today is the day.  
My very first day in high school and that in Canada.

I am not all that happy about it but Carlisle and Esme insist on it since their 'kids' have to go there too.

I tried to talk to my masters about it but Marcus didn't care, Aro meant it was fascinating and Caius insisted that we do it to keep an teye on the shapeshifters all the time.

Jasper had to manipulate my feelings with his powers to keep me from running to Volterra and ripping their heads off.

Since the Cullens all noticed that I don't want to hurt them unless I have a reason to, they started to accept me more.

Alice is still my best friend but I get along better with the others now.

Rosalie and Bella join us on our shopping trips sometimes. Jasper and Emmett along with my twin touch me how to defend myself.

Esme took me to the new house sometimes so I could help her decorate it.

Even Edward gives me a chance when he figured out that I learned how to play the piano by some of the biggest pianists themselves.

I may have spent all my life with the Volturi but Alec and I were sent on missions all over the world before.

We arrived at the new house two days earlier. It's even bigger than their old house and pretty nice. I especially enjoy the view, having spent the first day with Alec in my room just looking outside while he read a book.

I am so happy to have my twin with me so I don't get lonely when everyone is busy at night. He keeps me company and protects me although we both spent time with others now.

Alec also knows how nervous I am about going to school. He doesn't mention it to anyone instead my brother just took me hunting yesterday.

We hunted for a few hours and than sat by the lake near the house until early this morning just talking.

Alice picked out mine and Alecs outfit already when we returned only an hour before school was going to start.

The whole house was buzzing with excitement.

Seth was sitting at the kitchen table with Renesmee clad only in his boxer shorts like usual. It took me a while to get used to the boy always walking around half naked.

Esme was busy fixing breakfast for them. "Good morning, you two", she greets us, happily. "Are you excited for your big day?"

"Good morning to you too", Alec smiles back. He wraps his arm around my shoulders. "We will be fine today. It is actually something new for us too."

"Something new that we have to get ready for", Alice runs in, grabbing my wrist and pulling me upstairs before I can react.

She does my hair and make up quickly but as she attempts to change my clothes, I have to stop my friend. Sometimes Alice seems to forget that I am an acutal human or well vampire being and not some dummy. I get dressed in the clothes she picked out for me though after gushering her out of my room. I have to admit Alice really did an amazing job like always. I look nothing like my Volturi self.

"It's time to leave, girls", Emmet calls from downstairs.

Actually Alice, Alec, Seth, Emmet and I were the only ones who would go to school. The others all got jobs or went off to college apart from Renesmee who was staing at home with Esme.

"Looking good, blondie", Seth whistles when he sees me just to earn a hard slap from twin.

"Thanks, wolfie", I brush past him, smiling as I grab Alecs hand to pull him with me.

"I wish you would stop flirting with that guy", my brother grumbles as he gets in the car with me.

"Oh", I pout at him, poking his cheek. "Are you jealous because I am having fun and you not?"

Alec growls at me, slapping my hand away. "As if", he than scoffs. "He may be nice but he stinks."

I chuckle a bit. "I know", I kiss his cheek gently. "Just hold your breath my dear brother."

This seems to assure my twin since he doesn't say another word when the others get in.

The closer we get to school the more nervous I get. I hold Alecs hand tightly, playing with his fingers.

The school building is so ugly I thought Emmett was taking us to prison to have snack or something.

"And I was complaining about my old school being creepy", Seth raises an eyebrow as he gets out. "But this one has something my old didn't have. It has your beauty to lighten it's atmosphere."

The young shapeshifter wraps his arms around my shoulders as he pulls me against him, making me laugh loudly.

"You are so sappy", I roll my eyes up at him, grinning. "Sadly that doesn't work with me."  
"You sure it doesn't, blondie?", he wriggles his eyebrows at me.

Seth pulls me even closer to him, wrapping both his arms around my waist. I sling my own around his neck.  
"I am pretty sure", I kiss his jaw the only thing I can reach, teasing before I pull away from him, laughing.

"Jane wait that's not fair", Seth calls complaining as I grab my school bag and walk towards the school.

He quickly catches up with me, wrapping his arm around my waist. I am not sure why I let him do that but I guess I've just been lonely lately.

"Everything is fair when you're as old as me", I chuckle a bit.

"Is that allowed too than?", he squeezes my butt, making me squeal.

I slap his hand away and I swear if I were still human my face would look like a tomato right now.

Alice grins as she walks past us towards the main entrance. "You better stop flirting now or someones going to rip your head off, Seth."

He immediately drops his arm as he hears Alec growl behind him. I laugh and wait for my twin.  
Alec is obvious pissed and looks like he really is about to kill Seth for messing with me. He really needed to calm down, Seth is just making fun and so am I, it's not like we are a couple or something.

"You are totally overreacting", I roll my eyes as I bump my shoulder against Alecs gently.

"I just don't like to see him feeling my little sister up", my twin growls at me, quietly so nobody would hear him.

"I'm older than you", I tease him in my sing sang voice.

"That's not the point", he snaps mad. "I am just so done with your stupid behaviour. You are acting like such a slut lately! Everyone at the castle is talking about your affair with the master and that you screwed Demetri!"  
I stop dead in my tracks and stare at him.  
His words hurt me more than being burnt at stake. I can't believe my own twin thinks about me like that. I wish I could cry right now or get angry at him but I am just ..I don't know. I can't describe how I am feeling right now. All I know is that I can't stand to look into his eyes right now.

Before anyone can react, I turn around and just run.


	7. Chapter 7

I don't know how long I've been running or rather where.

I eventually stop when I realise that I'm back in front of my old home in England. The house has been abandoned ever since Alec and I were burnt all these thousands of years before.

Nobody wanted to live in a house that belonged to witches. I am surprised that they didn't destroy it but I guess the village people were scared our ghosts could hunt them.

I kept the house over the centuries and took care if it. It is my secret place where I can go when everything seems wrong. The place doesn't really hold happy memories but it shows me that things can always be worse.

I walk in and go to mine and Alecs old room where I sit on my old bed.

I just look around the room. Everything is still exactly like it was back than. The big bed we had to share and our closet as well as the large mirror that leans against the wall next to the door. I even bring exactly the same flowers everytime I come to visit - white lilies.

Something about my home just seems off. I don't know what it is, it has always seemed blurry that there wasn't one single room where our mother could have slept. The house only held one more room that was kitchen and living room at once. But well I guess that's just the way how memory work with the time they start to fade away like the colors of an old drawing.

It's weird though. I mean how is it possible that I remember my father so clearly but don't really have memories of Alec and me as children. My first real memory with him is when we were about 13 years old. About a year later I had my son Fynn and the following year my second son Lian and the year I died I gave birth to my only daughter Juna. That's another thing which irritates me, I know everything about my kids. Their birth dates, what they looked like, simply everything but I don't remember their father. I can't recall being married or another man in my life apart from my twin.

Nobody knows about my children, I didn't even tell Aro about them. Everyone thinks they know me but all they know is that I am cruel and was burnt at stake.

Nobody knows that my mother took my kids away from our hometown when we were burnt.

Nobody knows that I kept track on them and their families for mere generations.

I have my reasons to act like I do. My past made me who I am.

I sit in my old bedroom for hours or maybe even days just thinking about Alecs words when there is a knock on the door out of a sudden.

I jump to my feet on alert. Not even Alec knows that I kept the house.

I open the door slowly and much to my surprise it is Esme who stands outside in the rain.

"May I come in, Jane?", she asks me obvious concerned.

"How did you find me?", I raise an eyebrow at her but let her in anyway.

"Alice had a vision as soon as you decided where to go", Esme explains as she sits down on one of the kitchen chairs. "She told me the way."

I nod and take a seat across from her. "I needed some time to think."

"You know I am a good listener", she reachs over and squeezes my hand.

"I love Alec so much", I whisper my voice breaking. "I love him more than anything else. I couldn't image ever being without him. And he thinks that I am a whore. I love him and he is ashamed of me."

I wish I could just break down and cry but all I can do is sob without tears. That's what I hate most about being a vampire, I forget how to feel. The only emotion I remember is love and that only when it comes to Alec. I do my best to keep up the facade that I hate people and love hurting them but where is the fun when I can't image how it really feels.

"You two are so close", Esme says gently. "I am sure Alec didn't mean it."

"He did mean it", I keep sobbing. "Alec would never say something like that to me if he didn't really mean it."

"He feels terrible about it", she tries to assure me. "He wanted to come here himself to apologise but I thought it would be a bad idea."

I nod grateful that she stopped him.

"I wish I could just stay here forever", I admit to the older woman. "Everything would have been so much easier if I never had developed these power of mine. These stupid people would have never burnt me at a stake and I could have just had a happy live growing old, taking part of my childrens lives and than my grandchildrens before I would have died a natural death."

"Would you like to talk about your past?", Esme asks me gently.

"I don't know if I am ready for it", I sigh softly. "There are parts of it not even my masters know about."

"I understand", she smiles at me. "Would you maybe like to hear my story?"

I think about it for a second. I would love to hear her story and maybe find out more about this loving woman. All she has been to me ever since we arrived was caring and like a second mother to me.

I nod in a reply.

"I was near Columbus in Ohio in 1895", she starts her eyes looking distant. "I grew up on a farm and I was happy although it wasn't so easy being a lady. I wasn't afraid to get my clothes covered in dirt while helping on the farm something not everyone liked. I met Carlisle already ten years before he changed me and immediately fell in love with him. Unfortunately destiny had other plans in mind for me and I got married to Charles. He was a great man in public but at home", Esme stops for a second before she continues. "He was not a nice man. So instead of being a teacher like I always wanted to be, I was an abused housewife. He fought in the first world war but when he returned it just got worse. I had tried to leave him before he left but I couldn't as nobody helped me and I just didn't have the strength to make it on my own. I thought I would survive it and believed that he could change if I were a better wife but when I got pregnant I knew I had to run so I did. I fled from my home to a cousin in Milwaukee but he found me. I am not sure how I managed to do it but I made it to Ashland and I was free. Now I think it was the love I felt for my unborn child that gave me the strength I needed to get away from him and I am so thankful for my baby. In Ashland I could finally be happy and do what I want. I worked as a teacher and built a home for my baby and me. I couldn't have been happier when I held my tiny baby boy for the first time but than he got sick and died in my arms just two days after he was born. I was so sad and desperate after everything I have been through I couldn't bear the loss of my little bundle of joy and hope. So I jumped of a cliff and that's how Carlisle found me and saved my life."

I take a moment to think about what I just heard and all of a sudden I feel sorry for her. Esme is the nicest person I have ever met. She didn't deserve all the pain she's been through.

I feel horrible that I always hated her for being with Carlisle. I gave her the fault for what he did and never even considered that it couldn't have been her fault. She wasn't even born when everything happened, seeing that I am so much older than her. Compared to my two thousand years she's just a baby.

"I'm sorry, Esme", I squeze her hand gently. "I know how you must have felt when your baby died. It's not comparable with what happened to you but I had to go through it too. There is nothing worse than watching your children die."

"Did you have a baby when you were human?", the woman looks up at me, surprised. "I mean you are so young."

"I never told anyone about it", I whisper as if to make sure that nobody overhears our conversation. "It's my secret only Alec knows about it. I didn't even talk with my masters about it so please promise me that you are not going to tell my story to anyone."

"I would never do that, Jane", she promises me. "I won't even tell Carlisle and I swear I will keep my thoughts away from Edward as well."

I nod and take a long unnecessary breath. "I don't exactly remember being married or with a man but I had three kids. Two sons and a girl. I had Fynn when I was only fourteen and it wasn't exactly something extraordinary back than to have kids in my age. A year later I gave birth to Lian and only two months before I was burnt for being a witch I had my daughter Juna. They were so beautiful and healthy, I wish I could have stayed with them but my mother run away with my children when the villagers came to burn Alec and me. I kept watching over them from the distance though. My self control may have not been the best in my first years but I missed my babies so much I just had to find them. I even was able to hold them at night when my mother was asleep only days after being changed. It wasn't even hard to resist them simply because I loved them. All three of them had happy lives and many children. I am still so proud of them after all these years. It was terrible to watch them get old and die though. Knowing that they were happy and at peace with themselves didn't make it any easier as I hoped it would."

"Have you never considered changing them?", Esme asks me, gently.

"No", I shake my head. "Not even a second. I may be egoistic and for me being a Volturi is the right thing but it's a life I would have never wanted for my children. I mean sure I would have loved to have them with me for eternity but I wanted them to have a chance. I wanted them to experience all the things I did and even more. I wanted them to fall in love, get married and have a family to raise their kids and watch their grandchildren play in the garden. Sure if one of them had gotten sick, I would have tried to save them but everything worked just the way I hoped it would."

"Wow I must say that's one of the most selfless things I've ever heard", Esme squeezes my hand. "Everyone always talks about how cruel you are. Why don't you show them this side of you?"

"Which side?", I scoff, getting up. "The one who cares only about her brother? People already think we are much too close. You have no idea what they say about us. I don't give a shit about anyone and apart from that I enjoy being feared."

She watchs me, sighing. "I understand but please come back home with me."

"My home is here", I tell her, shaking my head.

"Your home is where your heart is", Esme smiles at me. "And I think that's where your brother is."

"Didn't you listen?", I start to sob again. "Alec hates me!"

"Oh sweetie", she hugs me tightly, rubbing my back. "I am sure he could never hate you."

"But he called me a slut", I cling to her. "He is ashamed of me."

"Why don't you talk to him?", Esme suggests. "He regrets it already."

"I'll come back I promise but please right now I want to be alone", I pull away from her, sighing.

She nods. "Call me if you need something." With that the mother of the Cullen family leaves me alone.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hey,**

 **I have to say that I am kind of disappointed that so many people read the story but nobody leaves a short review.**

 **So with a tiny bit of complaining to start with I hope you enjoy the new chapter.**

 **Katniss139**

I am not exactly sure how much time passed until I finally return to the Cullens.

Time simply doesn't matter anymore when you have eternity ahead of you.

I must have been gone for mere weeks since the leaves started to fall again and I miss Alec so much I am not able to bear it any longer.

I had spent my days all the same just sitting around and cleaning up. Once I went to the old archive to look through old documents out of boredom but what I find is simply ridiculus.

I find the transcript of our prozess but what they say is simply nonesense. If you believed these documents Alec wouldn't be my twin but my husband. It is so stupid I had to laugh so hard I got kicked out of the archieve. The people were all so stupid back than but than again they burnt us as at a stake. I have to admit that as ridiculous as it was I returned at night again though to look through all the wedding and birth certificates I could find. Much to my surprise they all say the same that Alec and I aren't twins.  
I know it is stupid to think but one night I caught myself imaging if it were true. I tried to picture how being with Alec would be but these thoughts are forbidden and could get me burnt a second time but for good than.

Esme came to see me once but I couldn't even talk to her about it. Alice called me sometimese to catch up and try to make me come back but it was futile.

I simply needed time to figure out what I want from eternity.

One day I simply can't stand it anymore and I have to return back to the Cullens.

Before I even make it to tthe front porch of the Cullens home, Alec has me wrapped up in his arms.

"Please, Jane", he squeezes me tightly, kissing my cheeks and hair. "Never leave me ever again!"

I immediately relax in his arms, holding onto him tightly. "I won't", I whisper against his skin. I have my face burried in his neck to muffle my sobs. "I missed you so much, Alec."

"I missed you even more", he cuddles me, warmly. "I am sorry for everything I said to you. I didn't mean it, you are not a slut. I was just so jealous that you spent so much time with Seth and other guys."

"You were right Alec", I admit speaking even quieter. "I am going to end things with Caius. It has been going on for much too long anyway. I don't want to be a homewrecker anymore, I guess I just got too used to it. I can explain you why I slept with them though."  
"You don't have to", Alec kisses my forehead. "I know you did it for Fynn, Lian and Juna."

"You know?", I look up at my brother surprised.

"Of course", he strokes my cheek gently. "I know you inside and out. I know you better than you know yourself. Apart from that did I follow you. Did you really believe I wouldn't notice you sneaking out?"

I don't really know what to reply so I just hug him even tighter. I never realizeed how much I acutally missed Alec over these past weeks or months. Right now here in his arms I actually feel complete again for the first time since I left.

My thoughts wander back to what I found out back at home if you can even call it that. These documents were nonesense although I wish.. No I can't think that specially not since my mind is not safe around Edward.

Alice eventually walks up to his, hitting Alecs arm playfully. "It's my turn", she protests, pulling me in for a hug and out of Alecs arms.

I pout slightly but wrap my arms around her anyway. I missed her more than I would like to admit and can't wait to go shopping with her again. "I was almost going crazy here when Esme told me you were wearing clothes from your human times."

"Don't worry", I chuckle a bit, pulling away again. "We can go shopping tomorrow. I won't wear these dresses again, they actually don't fit me anymore."

"Well obvious", she rolls her eyes. "You are a vampire now."

"I've been a vampire for over 2000 years", I shake my head, annoyed. "They don't fit anymore because I lost so much weight."

"I actually can't image you being.." , Alice starts but stops midsentence.

"Jane was huge as a human", my twin chuckles, wrapping his arm around my shoulder.

"I wasn't huge", I slap him annoyed. "I just had a baby before I was turned!"

"Still you looked like you were about to burst", he teases me, poking my belly.

"I am sorry I wasn't skinny when I had three kids in three years!", I push his hand away, laughing.

It is so hard to be mad at him, I just love him too much to be actually offened. Alec doesn't mean it though, at least I think so. I know it's ridiculous but the thought that my brother could think I am unattractive hurts me.

"I know", he kisses my cheek, laughing. "I know. You had three perfect little kids apart from that pregnancy really suited you."

I just roll my eyes. "As if."

Sometimes I am really glad that I can't blush or this would have been awkward.

"Wait a second!", Alice calls out in surprise. "You had children?"

I totally forgot that she was even there. Unfortunately I tend to forget my surroundibgs when I am messing with Alec. I never intented for Alice to find out about them. I guess now it is a tiny bit late for that though.

"Yes", I nod though since there is no point in denying it. "Two sons and a daughter."

"Wow that's incredible", she hugs me obvious in schock. "I would have never guessed!"

"Yeah", I rub my neck relucantly. "I am not so the motherly type."

"Jane was an amazing mother", Alec protests. "Her boys were very well raised for their ages and tiny Juna was a content newborn too."

"You have to tell me everything about them", my best friend jumps up and down, clutching my hands tightly in hers.

I wonder if she expected me to jump around with her. That is something I sure won't do at least not in public.

"Tomorrow on our shopping tour", I assure Alice in my best attempt to calm her down.

I mean I like her happy and overly excited nature but my children were supposed to stay a secret. "But only if you promise that you are not telling the others about them. Nobody Alice, got it?"

"Not even Jasper?", she pouts a bit.

"I know your relationship is based on trust so he's the exeption", I give in. "But if anyone else knows, you will get to know my powers."

"Okay", she squeaks before pulling me into the house.

Esme immediately comes over to me, hugging me gently. "I'm so happy that you are finally home."

"I'm glad to be back too", I reply, smiling at the woman who reminds me of my own mother.

Esme than pulls away after making sure I was okay.

It was unnecessary of course but it actually felt quite nice to know that someone actually cares for your well-being.

I actually wonder if I could have been just like her in another world. Would I have made my children felt so loved if I hadn't been changed? Would they have looked up to me like the Cullens do to Esme?

But than again I remember that it is futile to think of what could have been. What happened isn't going to change just as I am not going to change.

I may have been an acceptable mother two thousands of years ago but the longer my babys were gone, the more left my maternal instict. I stopped caring for anyone besides Alec. I helped destroy the immortal children, smiling in their tiny faces while throwing them in a fire. I didn't give a damn that they were just babies. These kids broke the rules if they intended to or not. As cruel as it sounds but the rules are the most importsnt thing. But apart from that it was the best that could have happened to these tiny human or rather vampire beings. I am already sixteen and for me it is still very hard to act my physical age. I hate being stuck in this young body when I am actually so much older. I would love to study like Bella and Edward but I can't because people would get suspicious and for these children it would have been even harder. I am sure they could have learned but it would have been torture for them to grow up in only their mind. If one of these immortal children had been my own son or daughter, I think I would have done the same. Being immortal is not a life I would wish for anyone.


	9. Chapter 9

About a week after my return to the Cullens and my beloved brother, Felix and Demetri arrive.

Carlisle invited them in politly and I have to admit that I was kind of surprised. I had expected Caius to come and check on his like usual.

Jasper who obvious sensed the slight disppointement sends me a wave of comfort.

I am not so repulsive against his powers anymore. They are actually very similar to Corins power.

I nod at Jasper although I didn't really need his comfort. I am going to end things with my master anyway.

Demetri immediately walks over to me when he spots me.

He looked just as handsome as always wearing his leather jacket and spiked up hair.

"Hey there, beautiful", he kisses the back of my hand, bowing in a mocking manner.

"Hello there, handsome", I laugh as I hug him tightly.

Demetri twirls around with me before placing me back down.

"How has my favorite girl been?", he asks me with his arms still around my waist.

"I am even better now that you are here", I tease him, pinching his cheek. "What about you?"

I don't want Demetri to know about my little breakdown from a few weeks before.

Around the handsome Greece I can simply be happy and even silly at times. He knows his place and respects me although we fool around a lot.

It's not about sex in the first place though. Yeah sure sometimes it happens but we mostly just flirt and enjoy being together.

My relationship with Demetri is totally different than what I have with Caius.

I started my affair with Caius not out of desire but because of the privileges it got me.

This way I earned more freedom so I could go and see my children whenever I wished to. Nobody dared to ask me where I go or stop me since I was under Caius special protection.

I guess I just kept it up after their and my grandchildren deaths because it felt actually good.

My relationship or rather friendship with Demetri doesn't get me privileges as I have a higher rank than him. That's a good thing too as he is neither my 'boss' nor married so nobody frowns upon our relationship and we don't have to sneak around.

It is nice to mess around with Demetri and even the masters - well Marcus and Aro - are okay with it as long as it doesn't interfere with our work.

Thankfully we both are very professional on our missions.

"Life is boring without you around to amuse me", Demetri shrugs while swinging me in his arms slightly. "It's about time you finally come home."

"I guess you'll have to suffer from my absense a little longer", I pout up at him. "How long are staying?"

"Felix and I just came back from a mission so we are the weekend off", he tells me. "I thought you and I could go for a short trip to egypt."

"Why egypt?", I raise an confused eyebrow at him.

"I want to visit Amun", Demetri whispers to me.

"I don't get it", I shake my head. "You haven't talked about him for mere hundreds of years. I hope you are not forgetting who holds your loyality."

"We both know that I am only loyal to you, my love", he kisses my forehead.

I am actually not quite sure if he is teasing me right now or not.

"Why would I join you?", I try to change the subject. "They don't really like me."

"The alternative to it is watching the 'Let's Dance'- marathon with Felix", Demetri chuckles.

Felix obsession with dance movies and shows is ridiculous. He watchs every single existing dance movie, musical and tv show. He loves the german 'Let's dance' and the american 'Dancing with the stars' or our italian 'Dancing stars'.

I mean I love to dance too but Felix really goes over the top.

When I was a little girl my mummy and father used to dance all the time and later than he taught me too.

My father came from the town but moved to our tiny village because my mother didn't want to leave her family. I always thought he really loved my mummy but than shortly after I moved out and had my first child, he left her. It was a huge shock when I went to visit mummy with Fynn and she told me that father was gone. I was so furious and although I know why he did it now, I just don't think I will ever be able to forgive him.

After he left Alec kept dancing with me and we are actually quite good but it is hard to find the time for it.

"You know a short trip really sounds amazing", I look up at him, sighing.

Demetri kisses my cheek, laughing amused. He knew that he won the discussion as soon as he mentioned the dance-marathon.

"Would you mind if I join you?", my brother appears next to us desperate. "I always wanted to visit the pyramids."

Alec was just as annoyed with Felix as everyone else in the Volturi castle and wanted to be as far away from him as possible.

"Of course you can join us", Demetri grins at him.

"And who is going to watch 'Let's dance' with me?", Felix pouts at us.

It really looks ridiculous. Felix is even taller than Emmett and totally bulky, he's a man built like a bear but he can be such a child. I wonder how people can even take him serious sometimes.

"You can watch it with Rose and me", Alice offers him excited.

"Sounds nice", Emmett nods. "You girls can join Felix in his hotel room. So we boys can play playstation."

Rosalie of course starts to protest immediately so I just tune her out. It's the best thing one would do when the woman was angry. She really is a terrible bitchy person.

"When can we leave?", Alec groans obvious annoyed.

"We better go now before that unlucky guy joins us too", Demetri laughs as he watchs Emmett trying to defend himself.

"But Jane", Renesmee runs over to me, hugging my legs tightly. "You promised me that you would tug me in tonight."

Renesmee really took a liking to me and my twin so she involves us in her bedtime routine too. Every day she chooses someone else to tug her in at night and tonight it's my turn.

The first time Edward and Bella weren't happy about it but they just can't deny their daughter any wish.

"I didn't forget it, Renesmee", I stroke her locks carefully. "Would you like to help me pack my bags?"

"We do", Alice calls as she storms towards us and takes Nessies hand.

She pulls us upstairs to my room before anyone can protest.

Later that evening my bags are finally packed to Alice approval and it's bedtime for Renesmee.

Demetri decided to join us when I take the little girl to their cottage.

I was carrying her on my hip as she was resting her head on my shoulder.

"I forgot how well a child suits you", Demetri whispers to me, his hand stroking my back gently.

I lean into his touch lightly. "You never saw me with a child before."

"I did", he shrugs. "With the immortal kids you burned."

I bit my lip sadly. At times like these around Renesmee who reminds me of my own daughter, I wish I had got the opportunity to spent more time with children.

"If you say so", I mutter as I place Nessie down on her bed. She was already half asleep so I had to change her in her nightgown.

Demetri waited outside for me before he joined us again when I got the little one settled in.

I lay down next to her so she could snuggle up to me. I take the book from the bedside table and read her a goodnight story.

Thankfully Renesmee is asleep before I even finished the chapter.

I read it to the end though before I get up, smooth her hair down and kiss her forehead.

Demetri waits until I closed the door to Renesmees room behind us until he wraps his arms around me.

"Can I do this now?", he whispers as he pulls me closer to him.

I nod gently when I feel his beath on my lips.

I immediately kiss him back. His kisses are light like the touch of a feather. Demetri is a lot more gentle and loving than you would give him credit for.

We stay like this for a few minutes than he pulls away.

"I missed you", he whispers, placing a kiss on my forehead.

"I missed you too", I smile at him.

Demetri just holds me for a few minutes before we make our way back to the main house.


	10. Chapter 10

We arrive in egypt early the next morning.  
All three of us are wearing our Volturi cloaks to shield us from the everlasting sunlight. There are barely any humans out here but well better safe than sorry.

It seems like Amun was expecting us already since he comes outside to greet us.

The older man seems not so happy to see us but asks us in none the less.

"He is not a danger", Amun informs us. "We have everything under control. Your services are not needed."

"We are not here because of your newborn", Demetri says, smiling at the man. "Okay I am but only to make sure our service won't be needed."

I look up at Demetri irritated. I didn't even know that the egypt circle had a new member but than again I've been away from civilisation quite a while.

Demetris creator leads us to a living room.

"Hello it's a pleasure to finally meet you", a sympathic young man walks over to us. "I'm Benjamin."

I watch Demetri and Alec shake his offered hand before I let him kiss the back of my hand. He introduces us to his wife Tia and Amus mate Kebi.

Just than I notice the person sitting in the corner of the room.

"Is that him?", I look at Amun.

The man just nods an indifferent impression on his face. I slowly walk over to the small figure and stop a few meters away from him. Similar to my companions and me, he is wearing a cloak that covers his face and body.

"Remove your hood", I tell him as neutral as possible.

I hate to admit it but since I am feeding from animal blood, I feel even more defenseless now than ever.

The man gets up and stands straight. I am surprised that he is actually taller than me and has a military haircut. He is actually quite handsome with broad shoulders and his short blonde hair.

"What's your name?", I look into his red eyes with as much confidence as I can manage.

"My name is Julius Brenner", he answers me in a broken englisch.

"Where are you from?"

"I am from Germany", Finn replies me.

I nod still looking him up and down. He is really handsome man, I have to admit that.

"Do you like what you see?", he grins at me when he notices my roaming eyes.

"Julius!", Kebi calls loudly. "Behave! You have no idea who you are talking to!"

I ignore the woman and smirk at Finn stepping closer to him. "I'm not sure. I would have to see more before I judge."

"I'm sure we could arrange that, beautiful", he chuckles as he stands in front of me.

"Do you think you could live up to my standards?", I raise my eyebrow at him. "I'm two thousands of years old, I gained some experience over the years."

"Seems like there is only one way to find out", Julius leans in to kiss me but I pull away from him.

He grins as I shake my head teasing. I place a hand on his chest. "Slow down, mister. I'm a lady, you'll have to prove me, your worth my time first."

"Let's go on a date than", he grins at me. "How sounds tonight?"

"Sounds good", I agree after a few minutes of considering it. "We can leave when it's dark outside."

Finn nods, excited. "Amazing, I'll see you later than."  
"Pick me up at my hotel", I call after him when he runs off.

I than turn towards Alec. "My dear brother I think we should give Demetri some time to catch up."

Of course my brother gets what I really mean and we go to the hotel.

"Is it really necessary that you fuck that newborn?", Alec glares at me once we enter the hotel room. "You could at least try and be discret."

"Why do you care so much about my sex life?", I frown at him angry. "You are almost obsessed with it!"

It really is ridiculous how much Alec seems to care about it. Whenever I flirt with a guy or just look at one, he gets mad at me. It's almost like he is jealous.

"I care about my sisters reputation", he shouts at me. "I don't want people to think of you as a whore. You want to be feared but when you fuck around you will loose all the respect people hold for you!"

I step closer to him mad. "You are just jealous Alec, admit it! You are angry because you are not getting laid!"

My twin just stares into my eyes with the same fury I feel in that moment. "Believe me, Jane I am getting laid as you put it! I enjoy it to have some privacy! And opposite yours my dignitiy is still intact!"

For the first time ever I use my power on Alec. His words hurt me more than anything else. I don't get it, why does the person I love most on this planet hurt me all the time?

The fascinating thing about Alec is that although he is in a lot of pain thanks to my powers, he manages to knock me out with his own.

When I regain consciousness, I am lieing in bed with my brother sitting besides me.

"How long was I out?", I frown up at him.

"Long enough to miss your date", he tells me nonchalant.

I sit up slowly, my head is spinning for the first time since I was turned. "Why did you do that?"

Alec stays quiet before he lays down besides me so we are eye to eye. "I love you, Jane", he whispers to me, stroking my side gently. "More than you can image. I love you more than I should."

Him touching me like that feels weird but familiar at the same time. Alec pulls me even closer to him and the next seconds his lips are on mine.

I know that it is wrong but it doesn't feel like it. To be honest I never felt better with any other man. Being with Alec as forbidden as it is, feels amazing. It is really mindblowing but somehow nothing new.

Images flash in front of my eyes. Alec and me in a church, getting married. Alec holding my hand while I give childbirth to Fynn. Alec and me sneaking kisses while working in the garden with our children running around us.

These flashbacks are really confusing me. They are much too realistic to be fake or just wishful thinking but how is that possible?

Alec and I are twins, aren't we? I only have one choice to find out and that is to talk with my father.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello it's me,**

 **I am sorry it takes me so long to update. I am really trying my best to finish the story so it may take some time but I won't abandon this fanfiction. So please stay patient with me, thank you. I would love it if you left me a few reviews as motivation though and hope you enjoy my story.**

 **Katniss139**

The next morning I can't take it anymore. I grab all my stuff and return back to the Cullens.  
I need to talk to Carlisle or I'll be going crazy. I just hope he won't judge me but actually I don't give a damn if he does. He doesn't have a right to do so.  
The run to Forks helps me clear my mind.

I know sleeping with Alec was totally wrong but it was just amazing.

Sure being with Caius or Demetri or whoever was great too but something about the way Alec made me feel was so different. He made me not only feel loved and desired like my other lovers but whole as well.

Once I arrive in Canada, Alice already awaits me on the front porch.

"Carlisle is still at work", she informs me. "He knows you are coming."

I nod quickly and without another word I run to the hospital where Carlisle works.

The doctor is already expecting me when I enter his office.  
"Hello Jane", he smiles at me, kindly.

I just take a seat across from him. "We need to talk!"

The last thing I wanted when I learned about my mission in Forks was to be anywhere near the Cullens and especially Carlisle.

My dislike for the 'Cullen kids' and Esme has almost vanished completely but I still hate Carlisle.

"Of course", he says when he leans back in his seat. "What would you like to talk about?"

"Don't play stupid", I hiss at him angry, slamming my hand down on the table. "You know exactly what I want to know!"

It took me all my self control to not break the table or torture him. I hate how Carlisle pretends to not know me, considering our past.

"Jane, my sweet little Jane", he sighs sadly. "I tried to explain why I left so many times but you were never willing to listen."

"I don't want to talk about you being a terrible father", I get up frustrated, pacing around the room. "I am confused. I had like memories coming back to me yesterday about Alec and me and Fynn."

"So you finally found out?", Carlisle lets out a relived sigh.

"Found out what?", I stop to stare at him.

"The truth about Alec and you", he explains.

Now I am utterly confused what does he mean with the truth about Alec and me. Could it be true that Alec was my husband?

"We are not twins, are we?", I mutter as I sit back down on the chair again.

"No, I don't know how you came to believe it", Carlisle tells me. "I mean you remember and children."  
If these flashbacks I have are really showing me the truth, Alec was or rather still is my husband.

Now I feel even worse than when I thought I had slept with my brother. If Alec is my husband that would mean I cheated on him the whole time.

Right now I wish I could cry. I mean what I did with Caius was always different to me. He was the cheating one, not me. It was Caius who chose to be selfish and willingly risked his marriage just to have some fun. Sure I was the one he was unfaithful with but if it hadn't been me, he would have done it with someone else. I didn't really care about it much since I have barely ever seen Athendora and don't like her at all but now I feel horrible.

Alec probably still thinks we are twins but than again he never approved of my affairs. Now that I think about it, he always seemed jealous when I was with another man. The only good thing is that he probably slept with others over the years as well. So it doesn't really count what happened the last two thousand years.

"Why did I think we were twins?", I ask Carlisle confused.

Right now I was totally overwhelmed by all these memories that came floating back to me like a damm within my head had broken.

I try my best to hold them back and focus on my conversation with Carlisle.

"I don't know Jane", he tells me slightly worried. "I have a theory but -"

"Tell me", I interrupt him, harshly.

"I think it could be the influence of a power", he was not even faced by my outburst. "Jane I think it could have something to do with Caius."

"That's ridiculous", I shake my head almost laughing. "He has no power."  
"Please hear me out, dear", Carlisle says stressed. "I think it's his pwer to alter the memory of people." He lifts his hand to stop me when I am about to disrupt his speech again. "I mean you remember your children but not your husband? That is impossible especially since you have been together forever. Someone must have messed with your memories."  
I have to admit, his theory isn't so ridiculous after all.  
"If it were true and Carlisle had an ability like this", I start confused. "Why would he want to keep it a secret?"  
"I think it's all because of you", Carlisle says so slowly as if he was scared, I'd kill him. "Caius had an eye on you long before you were changed."

"Now you've finally lost your mind", I burst out laughing loudly.

This time Carlisle really looks offended by my reaction. This is probably the first time someone doubted his intelligence.

"Jane Elizabeth Cullen-Bennet", he calls out angry. "I am trying to help you. I expect you to show me some respect."

It's been so long since anybody called me by my full and real name. People just call me cruel nicknames or by my first name.

"I only show respect to those who deserve it", I reply as I get up calmly. "If you'D excuse me now please."  
I leave a baffled Carlisle behind as I walk out of the hospital gracefully with my head held high.

Okay, I take a deep unnecessary breath to sort my thoughts. I'll first talk to Caius than Alec or better the other way around. If Caius really did it, I can't assure anything.

I quickly run off into the woods before sitting on a cliff and looking down at a sea.

Right now, I just need to be alone and progress everything that happened. My talk with Carlisle actually made me doubt Caius. It is ridiculous that he did it because he wants me but the rest... It would make sense if he had a power like that.

I am not sure how long I sat there but when it got dark outside I walk back home to the Cullens place.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello there my dear readers,**

 **I chose to try something new. How about I post the next chapter when the story reachs 11 reviews? It would really mean a lot to me. But just in case it doesn't work the new chapter will come up soon though.**

 **Your Katniss139**

* * *

Once I enter the living room Edward glares at me.

Okay that's new. We got along quite well over the past weeks so why is he so hostile now again.

"Do you have a problem?", I raise an eyebrow at him.

"I can't read your thoughts", Edward announces. "Actually I can't read anyones thoughts."

"Your wife is a shield", I roll my eyes as I sit down in an armchair.

The Cullen boys were all gathered in the living room, playing video games.

I couldn't see any of the girls or Felix though.

"Bella is out hunting with Renesmee", he shales his head. "Jazz does your power work on her?"

"I am busy", the empath growls at Edward not even looking up.

I glance at the tv screen, obvious Jasper is just about to loose against Emmet. I don't get it why these guys are so obsessed with their playstation.

"Jasper please this is important", Edward groans annoyed.

"Come on", Emmett laughs loudly as he pushs his ellbow against his brothers. "Try your power. You lost anyway, loser."

For a second I am actually worried the always so calm Jasper may rip Emmetts head off but he just hisses in frustration.

After they ended their match, the empath turns around to face me.

"I sense nothing", he shakes his head. "That's really weird. Jane would you try if yours works?"

"On whom?", I raise an eyebrow irritated.

Usually I am forbidden to torture anyone but obvious they think it's my fault that their abilities don't work.

"Me", Emmett gets up to stand in front of me. "I always kind of wanted to know how it feels like."

I nod and smile my torture smile at him but nothing happens. That never happened wkthout a shield being involved. I clench my teeth in anger and try it again but still nothing.

"It doesn't work", I scream out furious as I focus on the other men with the same result.

"I'll call Carlisle", Edward grabs his phone. "Emmet you go out and see if there is another vampire around. Jasper you call the girls."

I watch them annoyed. They are totally overreacting. I am sure there is some really simple explanation why our powers are not working.

To be at least a little bit useful, I call Aro at home in Volterra.

"My beloved Jane", he greets me, happy. "It's such a pleasure to hear your lovely voice again. How can I help you?"

I roll my eyes at his voice but try to not let my annoyance be heard. "My master we have a problem here in Canada. Something is blocking all our powers andit has nothing to do with the shield. Have you any idea how that is possible?"

"No my dear", Aro replies obvious amazed again. "but that is very interesting. I would love for you all to come and visit me, sweet child to find out more."

"I'll talk to them", I promise my master before hanging up.

By the time I finished my talk, Felix and the Cullen girls are already back. Alice immediately wraps her arms around me, rocking me slightly.

"I am sure you'll need some time to progress everything", she whispers to me. "I won't tell anyone though."  
"Thanks Alice", I pull away from her.

"Renesmee try to show me what you did today please", Edward asks his daughter, pulling all the attention to him.

The small girl places her hand on his cheek but by the frown on his face it doesn't work either.

"I found nothing", Emmett announces as he enters the house again.

"What is going on?", Felix asks as he steps closer to me.

Back in Volterra when we were on missions Felix was always the one who was supposed to protect me. He was basically my own guard as well as Demetri and even Alec. All three of them had order from the masters to keep me save even if it costs them their lives.

"None of our powers work", Jasper explains him. "We were already trying to find a intruder but there is nobody."  
"Maybe we should call Demetri and Alec", Felix suggests full in Volturi guard mood.

"That's not necessary", I glare at him with my most intimitating stare. "I am sure the Cullens are more than just capable to take care of this situation as well."

He looks down at me, irritated. "Wait a second, Jane. Why are you here and they are not?"

I flinch deeply as I take a step away from him. I can't tell anyone what happened at least not yet. I need to sort things out with Alec first.  
"Right now my power may not work, Felix", I growl at him. "But I am still a high ranked guard member and you have to obey my orders. And I order you to not call anybody or otherwise I will inform the masters about your disobeyance and disrespect towards me."  
"I understand, ma'am", Felix says after a second and bows down to me. "I am sorry for asking."

I turn away from him and face the Cullens with a stony expression. "I'll be in room if you need me."

I storm upstairs and lock the door quickly. The second I fall on my bed, I start sobbing loudly.

This whole situation is just so overwhelming. I curl up on the bed and wrap my arms around my legs tightly.

Right now I wish Alec was here to hold me in his arms and comfort me like he did for as long as I can remember. Everything I believed in was a lie, my whole life is one big farce.

I hear how someone enters my room and sits down besides me. I know from the scent that it is Esme who pulls me in her arms. I cling to her as she strokes my back gently.

"Please stop crying", she whispers to me. I haven't even noticed that I was sobbing. "I don't know what happened in egypt but I am sure you will sort it out."

"It's not just that", I sob loudly. "There are so many things at the moment. I am loosing control over my life."

"Would you like to talk about it?", Esme offers me.

"No", I shake my head just clinging to her. "I just want to be alone."

She nods and tries to get up but I hold onto her. "It's okay. I'll stay but Carlisle will have to check on you."

We just sit here for a while until Carlisle calls me to his office. This whole behavior is so unlike me. I never was so emotional before, not in my early vampire years and not in my human lifes. Well that's not completely true, I was so hormonal for a while but that had to do with hormones and vampires do not have any.

I let Esme lead me there and sit down on the bridge, confused.

"Why am I being checked over?", I ask him weakly.

"Edward thinks it could have something to do with your stay in egypt", he informs me as he runs some ridiculous tests on me. "Esme could you leave Jane and me alone please."

Esme nods and leaves before I get the chance to protest.  
"Jane please lay down for a second", Carlisle asks me suddenly all nervous. "And pull your shirt up."

I do as he said, confused. I never saw Carlisle like this before. He was always so controlled and calm.

"What are you doing?", I asks him as he does an ultrasonic testing on me. "This doesn't work on vamp-" I stop midsentence when I hear an flutter coming from the machine. "Is that-?"  
Carlisle nods as he sits down on the bridge besides me. "It is impossible! This really is truly impossible!"

"Maybe this thing is broken or something", I stutter as I sit up desperate. "Try it again."  
"Edward!", he calls loudly instead. "I need you here for a second."

The mind reader has already entered the room before I can protest against it.

Edward runs the same ultrasonic testing on me as Carlisle did and there it is again. The same light fluttering sound.

"That's impossible but well we were wrong before", Edward says as he sits on the chair he has pulled over. "Carlisle this is amazing."  
Great now the mind reader goes all Aro on us with his amazing. And what is it with this Cullens and sitting down when something shocking happens. Did they forget that we are all vampires and don't need to sit down?

"Could someone please talk to me?", I hiss at the two men who started to discuss with each other.

They look towards me, excited. "Jane, you are pregnant."


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello,**

 **as you may have noticed my little experiment worked so here is the new chapter. At the moment I really have a lot of inspiration as this twist offers lots of stuff to write about.**

 **So thank you for your amazing reviews and reading my story.**

Even now almost an hour after Carlisle and Edward told me the news, I still can't believe it.

The two men left me alone to progress everything and sent Alice and Esme to me.

I'm still sitting on the bridge sobbing nonstop with both women trying to soothe me.

They are pretty confused about my sobbing fit since nobody told them what's going on.

"Jane dear", Esme tries after I calmed down a bit. "Please tell me if I can do anything."

"We can go shopping until you feel better", Alice strokes my back. "I'm sure everything will be fine."

I take a deep breath before looking down. "I'm not normal. I am having a baby."

Esme gasps loudly before pulling me in her arms once more. "Wow that's amazing! Are you not happy?"

I am actually not sure if I should be happy about my unexpected pregnancy or not. I mean sure it's great that I get to have a baby but there are so many reasons that speak against it.

I am a vampire and we can't have babys. What if my child dies because my body doesn't change for it to grow?

How is it even possible for me to get pregnant? It has never happened to a vampire before.

What will my masters do? Will they see my child as a danger for our nature? Will they try to kill it?

What about my position in the guard? I won't be able to go on missions all the time with a baby.

The most important question is what will Alec say though? I am a hundred percents sure that Alec is the father of my unborn child. I mean I slept with Caius and Demetri over the years and never got pregnant so it must have something to do with Alec.

I need to call Alec but what will people think? Everyone believes that we are twins. There will be so many rumors and bad tongues talking about us.

"I can't have this baby", I let out a broken shriek when I realize the truth. "I just can't!"

I jump to my feet and than skip out of the room and downstairs to find Carlisle.

"Are you okay?", Felix catchs me in his arms when I fall down the last few steps of the stairs. I am such a mess even my vampire senses are failing me. "You look awfully pale even for one of us."

"No I am not", I sob tearlessy again as I let him put me down on the sofa. "Where is Carlisle? I need to talk to him right now."

"He left for work again", the huge bulky vampire explains me gently. "I'm sure someone could call him though."

"I'll do it", Edward offers as he enters the room

again with a pile of books in his arms.

"Felix why don't you go and watch your 'Let's dance'-marathon with Rosalie and Alice?", I cover my request in a question.

I really don't want Felix around right now. I trust him with my life but he is still loyal to the masters and won't hesitate to tell them everything.

"Sounds great", he grins broadly before grabbing Rose wrist and pulling her upstairs. "Alice! Come on, it's 'Let's dance'-time!"

Both girls try to protest half-hearted but Felix drags them outside anyway. By now everyone besides Edward and Esme have left the house probably to give us some privacy. The Cullen mother comes downstairs to me and pulls me in her arms again. "Would you like a cup of blood?", she offers me worried.

"No", I shake my head. "I want to go home! I want my life back!"

Esme just rocks me lightly as we wait for Carlisle. Edward was sitting on the sofa opposite us and flipping through old books.

Once Carlisle comes home, I run over to him. "You need to make it go away."

"What?", Carlisle frowns deeply.

"I can't have a baby", I sob loudly. "Nobody can know about it! You have to get it out!"

"No Jane", he tells me firmly as he grips my upperarms roughly. "I won't allow that!"

I struggle in his arms to pull away from him but it's futile. "Let go of me! You have no right to tell me what to do!"

I never felt so weak and helpless in my whole life. This weak little girl here is not me. I don't even recognize myself anymore since I've been here.

"I am your father, Jane!", he screams obvious furious. "And as your father I forbid you to kill your baby! I am not helping you murder my grandchild!"

"You lost your right to call yourself my father the day you abandoned us!", I call out just as angry as he is.

All my sadness suddenly turned into fury and what would I not give to have my powers right now.

"You know I had to leave Jane!", he hisses at me. "It would have been too dangerous for you or your mother not to mention your tiny newborn Fynn!"

"You still don't get it!", I let out a shrill shriek of fury. "It's not only that you left us!"

"Than explain it to me!", Carlisle shakes me again. "How am I supposed to know when you don't talk to me?"

"Have you ever considered how I felt when I found out that you replaced mummy and me?", I start to sob again. "You just got yourself a perfect new family! You never tried to find me eventhough you knew I was a vampire too! Nobody knows about your real past! So no Carlisle I do not consider you as my father anymore! And you either help me unravel my latest mistake or I'll find someone else who does it! Now let go of me or I'll call my masters on you!"

"Jane", he drops my arms with a pained expression. "I never knew you felt like that. I thought you wanted nothing to do with me. I was scared you would reject me."

"It's too late now", I shake my head still sobbing. "The only thing you can do for me is help me through this."

Carlisle watchs me with all kinds of regret written over his features. There is a long heavy silence between us before he sighs. "Please Jane overthink your decision and talk with the father. It's not just your baby and this is most likely a one time opportunity."

I shake my head sighing. "I can't have this baby. I want it but I can't have it."

"Why not?", he asks me calmly. "We are all going to help you. You'll be here for the next century anyway."

"It's not that", I whisper, looking down. "I know that I could raise this baby on my own. I am just.. I don't want people to think bad of my baby because of Alec and me. Everyone thinks we are twins, they are already saying terrible things about us."

"Let them talk", Carlisle strokes my back. "You were a great mum back than and you'll be an amazing mother now. I believe in you, Jane."

I pull away sighing and take a step away from him. "You should go and talk to your family."

Sometime during our fight Esme and Edward must have left to give us some privacy. I wonder how much they witnessed of our discussion before they left. I can't even imagine how Esme must feel that Carlisle lied to them. Basically their whole relationship is built on one huge lie. I hope they can work it all out as a family.

My father nods worried and quickly calls everyone for a family meeting. I offer Edward and Bella to take Renesmee to bed tonight to give them all some time to sort things out.

Since nobody is able to use its power Bella and Edward are more relaxed to leave me alone with their child.

Now that I am pregnant, I see taking care of Renesmee tonight totally different.

In a few months it could be my daughter or son that I fix something to eat and bath before I take it to bed. It could be my child that I curl up in bed with and sing a lullaby or tell fairytales to.

I could do all the things I couldn't do back than with my kids. I mean the new baby would never be able to replace them but I want my baby.

The longer I think about it, the clearer it gets. I can't just kill this baby.

I was fourteen when I had Fynn, Lian and Juna, no money and still I managed to raise them to be happy.

Yes, I can do this. I never cared about what people think before so I won't start now.


End file.
